As we progressed through the 1980s, 1990s, and 2000s, affirmative action and other initiatives helped create more opportunities for previously marginalized groups.

The conversation evolved from equality (equal access) to equity (addressing disparities in resources and knowledge that prevented equal outcomes).

1. We Didn't Start with the Leaders

The first major mistake in DE&I implementation is that we rarely begin by ensuring organizational leaders feel included, valued, and regulated themselves. Instead, DE&I is often:

Many executives and high-level professionals don't feel they can be vulnerable or authentic. They've often achieved their positions by cutting off parts of themselves and are now expected to implement inclusion initiatives while themselves feeling excluded.

I witnessed this firsthand in healthcare when I was completing my doctorate in nursing. In a meeting about nurse safety, high-level decision-makers were creating policies without any nurse managers present.

As someone who had experienced workplace harm as a nurse, I felt tremendous risk in speaking up – would pointing out flaws in their plan jeopardize my position?

When leaders operate from dysregulated nervous systems – overwhelmed, defensive, or afraid – they make shortsighted decisions.

They may genuinely want to implement DE&I initiatives but lack the regulation and healing needed to do so effectively.

2. We Didn't Allow for Diversity of PERSPECTIVE

The second critical failure is not creating space for genuine questions and diverse perspectives about DE&I implementation. When someone questions a diversity hiring practice and is immediately labeled racist or sexist without explanation, we shut down necessary dialogue.

For DE&I to work, we must be able to explain:

When we shame people for asking questions, we kill off a crucial aspect of diversity – diversity of PERSPECTIVE.

True inclusion means everyone has a seat at the table, including those with differing viewpoints.

I've heard from many people, particularly white men, who feel they no longer have a voice in these conversations. When people feel excluded from "inclusion" efforts, they become more susceptible to radicalization – not less.

(Here is an incredibly insightful video on the topic of how humans become radicalized to hate groups, by former Neo-Nazi recruiter Arno Michaelis).

The key element missing from most DE&I work is attention to nervous system regulation. When humans feel threatened or dysregulated, we become:

For DE&I initiatives to succeed, we need to start with trauma recovery and nervous system regulation work. This creates the foundation that allows people to:

The path forward requires us to:

Begin with leadership regulation: Help leaders process their own experiences and trauma before implementing DE&I initiatives

Create psychological safety: Ensure everyone feels they can ask questions without being shamed

Honor all perspectives: True inclusion means everyone has a voice in the process

Address the nervous system: Understand that dysregulation leads to poor implementation and backlash

Until people can approach DE&I with kindness, compassion, and curiosity – from a regulated nervous system state – we'll continue to see resistance and failure.

By addressing the root causes of this resistance, we can create more effective and sustainable progress toward truly diverse, equitable, and inclusive organizations.

--Dr. Lee

If you desire, our ITRR team is here to support you in exploring how nervous system regulation can benefit you (and your organization). You can connect with us HERE